College Essay: Why I am Unique? Rough Draft

"Beyond your impressive academic credentials and extracurricular accomplishments, what else makes you unique and colorful?

We know that nobody fits neatly into 500 words or less, but you can provide us with some suggestion of the type of person you are. Anything goes! Inspire us, impress us or just make us laugh. Think of this optional opportunity as show and tell by proxy and with an attitude, but please restrict your submission to what will fit on one sheet of paper."

Lain Coubert

"This essay topic is particularly satisfying because it acknowledges what I had written in a previous rough draft of my common application; that 500 words were nowhere near enough words to describe something significant, and on this premise rests, ironically, the chance to discover other noteworthy aspects of oneself, such as a college experience.  Words are being wasted as I type however, and I’ve always found a certain amount of concurrence with Nietzsche, that “what is superfluous is hostile to what is essential,” so I’ll attempt in the 400 some words I have left to give you a brief description of everything quintessentially “Lain Courbert.”  I like to think of myself as versatile. My iTunes library ranges from Chopin to Buddy Holly to Adele. I’ve read Nicholas Sparks and Aristotle. I’ve refused cheese popcorn on moral principle and I’ve participated in a rave at the Christchurch Chaplaincy in Oxford. I’ve seen sunrises atop mountains, but I prefer the calming darkness of the beach at nighttime. I consider myself an Objectivist, but I staunchly believe in a higher power. I’ll choose an intimate drive over a party nine out of ten times; I’ve been to many parties; my yearly mileage is 18000. I’ve criticized Mayan pyramids for their wavering architectural integrity. The voice in my head is often an Albanian named Butrint, but I’ve never been to Eastern Europe. I started a political revolution at my school; a teacher of mine later commented on the absurd number of Anthem copies floating around. If I could choose a time period to live in other than my own, I’d choose Dostoevsky’s Russia. If I could recreate society, I’d shape it in the way of Ancient Athens (without slavery, naturally). I think impossibilities; I perform improbabilities. I find a great deal of charm in ambiguity. I’m politically minded and enjoy arguments; debates are daily occurrence for me. I’m anti-authority, in the sense that age or title has never been my standard for consensual governance. I believe political correctness is a worse prison than the words it’s meant to protect people from. I sometimes pretend my car is an X-Wing. My greatest source of frustration is incompetence; my greatest source of annoyance is the minivan (My apologies if you own one). Blackouts are a blessing for me; there’s something very spiritual in candlelight, especially when it’s coupled with my green laser pointer from Chinatown, which, no matter how often I use it, never ceases to amaze me. I’m concerned with everything, and indifferent to almost everyone. If my life could have a theme song, I’d want it to be Eden Roc, which, being purely instrumental, is unrestricted by the limits of language. I feel an intense joy in writing new lyrics in my each time I hear it. I'm a bibliophile, and often find myself trying to live the lives the characters. Your prompt says to explain how I’m unique, but I see myself as completely normal, except in one aspect, that I see myself as such."

           -L.C.